New Beginnings

I have been away for over a month, and before that I was scarce as well. Some changes have been going on in my life that I was not ready to talk about them. But recently I have been feeling the need to get them out. Tell them to the world so I can focus on finding the path that I'm supposed to take.

I have been trying to restructure this Blog, and I think that life has made it so that I don't have a choice in this matter, it has just transformed me completely and with it this Blog.

When I chose the name Cocoons2Butterflies, I chose it because it was what I have been trying to achieve for most of my life. I have been on this constant quest to find myself, and just when I think I have found me, I realize that there's much more of me to find.

I feel that this journey should be shared. Because maybe, there is someone out there who will benefit from my story.

I am still learning, and every day I look forward to knowing a little bit more about myself than the day before.

The event that has triggered this new path is when I made the decision to stay in NYC and not move to Florida as I was expecting to do.  With this choice I have made, I also turned into a single mom, something I didn't want to be. However, I feel that this was the right choice, and when I made it I felt a huge weight come off my shoulders. I no longer feel anxiety every morning, I no longer cry every single day.

This has been one of the hardest decisions I have ever made, but I know that it was the right choice.

With this change in my life I have realized that even though I thought that I had found myself, now, with this new life ahead of me I realized that there is so much I don't know about myself and so many bad habits engrained in me, things I have to get rid of. Fear of rejection, a neediness for affection, low self esteem, feeling that I'm not good enough, not pretty enough...

But there are some things I do know now, like.

I love to sing out loud because it makes me feel like I am releasing into the wind all my feelings, be it of frustration, or love.

I love to dance, the movement of my body also allows me to release those feelings that are trapped inside of me, it makes me feel good.

I like to listen to music in Spanish. This is something I had not done since High School. When I was 13 I had my first boyfriend. I remember he liked Metallica, I had no clue who they where, but I bought their cassette and listened to it until I liked it. This was the beginning of a life of Rock and Heavy Metal music. I grew up as a "Rockera" but now, at age 37 I asked myself. What kind of music do I like? A few years ago I learned to like Hip Hop, and I listen to J-Pop with my daughter Gaby. But all these have been influences from other people in my life. So I again questioned myself and went back to my childhood, what did I listen to, before I was 13? And the answer was Spanish music. So I decided to find a Spanish Music Station who plays a wide variety of songs in Spanish and a few in English and I have been discovering many songs that I enjoy very much, I made a YouTube playlist and I learn the lyrics of the songs and I sing them at the top of my lungs and I feel great!


I love to learn new things. I love to read, especially books that teach me about how to better myself or anything new that interests me.

I love God. I was raised Catholic and went to school, and learned the Bible, and after I graduated high school I never went back to Church, but recently a friend asked me to be her daughter's godmother for her Confirmation and it required me to be a Church goer. I had to get a priest to sign a form saying that I went to Church every Sunday and that I was a member of the Church. So I went to Church every Sunday and registered myself with the Church and got the paper signed. I was also able to participate and be the Godmother of my adorable goddaughter Marylin.  After that passed, my friend April asked me if I wanted to go to Church with her. She is not Catholic, and she goes to a non-denominational Church. One day when I was feeling specially stressed out and in a bad place I decided to call her up and say that I wanted to go to Church with her, and I must say that it changed my life. I really love this Church, it really makes me feel like part of a community, and I feel the presence of God, and I feel that every week the pastor says exactly the words that I need to hear, and I know God is speaking at me through him. I never believed that I would feel this way since I had ignored God for a big chunk of my life. But here I am, and I know that's where I should be.

I love my wavy hair. My hair is normally wavy, and when I was in college I always wore it showing off the curls. But after I moved to NYC I started straightening out my hair and did so, every day. Recently I allowed my mom to convince me to cut my hair and start wearing it curly again. I must say I am very glad, it looks nice, my friends and co-workers keep complimenting me on it and it is so much easier to take care of. People say: I love what you have done with your hair. And I say: Well, I didn't do anything to it. This is my natural hair.

So here it is, a little bit of what I am learning in this New Beginning. I hope you join me on this journey and find yourself once again if you feel that any part of you has already been lost. Just know that the parts of you that are lost, are just merely waiting for you to find them and they will make you shine once more.

Love yourself!

Name 5 things that you love! Share the Love!

What do you share and what do you keep to yourself?

Lately I have been thinking about the restructure of my Blog. I want to make it be more educational.The reason for that being that I am in a constant state of learning. I am day in day out reading and learning about a few topics in specific. One of the topics I am constantly learning about is Education, mainly how to raise kids in a way to build up their true potential and how to deal with the different setbacks that sometimes occur normally throughout life. I also love to learn about marriages and how to make marriages better, and how to be a better person and recently I am absorbing all things social media. Because I am constantly learning about these topics I would like to be able to share with you the things that I learn while I learn them, but I want to be able to write with my own voice, and describe the reason why I was inclined to learn about the subject in particular. Yet I am left thinking that there are times when the reason behind the learning of a particular topic is highly personal and I might say, What does it matter if I share a private topic with the online world? No one really knows me in real life, but then I think of all the people I really DO know in real life that will read it and then it makes me re-evaluate writing about it in the first place.
I know that many of you who Blog may have encountered yourselves with a dilemma like this. What do you do when you have a sensitive and personal topic in mind and would like to know what other people think about it, but don't want other people who you really know in real life to read it?
Hove you ever been in a situation when you decided to share and it backfired?
Please share! :)

Do Teachers influence your future profession?

Today my daughter Gaby who just started middle school told me that they changed one of her favorite teachers. He was her Social Studies Teacher and she told me that this year for the first time she was liking the class.  However this teacher, was actually a Math Teacher who had been assigned as a temporary teacher to give the Social Studies Class until they were able to hire a permanent teacher.

I do understand how a Math teacher should really be teaching math and fortunately he was able to get a job teaching Math at another school. I mean, if he was a good teacher teaching Social Studies, I bet he will be an amazing teacher teaching Math.

What got me sad though was my own memories of Middle School. How my 6th grade teacher was a History/Social Sciences Teacher and how she was so mean. How I hated her, and how much I hated Social Studies since then.  This got me thinking. If I hate Social Studies because I had an awful teacher, would I love the class had I gotten an awesome teacher?

On all my years of Study, including College, I only recall 2 good Social Studies/History Teachers. My eighth grade Social Studies teacher who was fairly nice and my College History Professor who I had for only one semester. I remember going to that History class in College and thinking that I wished I had that teacher since I was young. He was amazing and gave the class as if it was all some gossip, so it was really fun. But had it been too late for me? I have all these years of history lessons with horrible, mean or deathly boring teachers and it left me ignorant on the subject. I did not learn Geography, or History, or Social Studies all through my teenage years so now when I read the news paper or try to help my daughter with homework I feel dumb. I don't know almost anything. So how am I supposed to learn years of History Lessons now? When I really don't care enough to learn it. I just give up on it and maybe grasp a thing or two from my daughter's homework throughout the years.

Then I questioned myself, are teachers really that much of an influence in a child's life? I always thought that the course of study one chooses was mainly based on a basic inclination that we are born with, some kind of innate skill. But this made me doubt my theory. What if a child with a natural ability in a particular subject, say math for example, what if all his life his Math teachers were mean and even abusive to him. What if never in his life he had a nice inspiring teacher on that subject? Would this child avoid math in his career even if mathematical skill was natural in him?

I always found that my favorite teachers growing up where English teachers, I absolutely LOVED all my English teachers and what I Love the most is to write so it makes sense. However when I was in college, I had a horrible English Teacher who discouraged me from writing, not because she said I was a bad writer but because she thought I had a "disturbed mind" when I wrote. This teacher discouraged me to the point that I stopped writing for over 10 years. It was only after I got inspired by other mentors, friends which in a way are teachers as well even if not in a classroom, that I was able to start writing again.

Did I see my English Teachers as Amazing Teachers because they were teaching me my favorite subject? Or did English become my favorite subject because I had amazing Teachers?

What do you think molds us more? What experiences did you have growing up? What do you think influences more our decisions? Our innate passions? Or Inspiring teachers?

The ABC's of ME - Another Get to know me Post

I am a VoiceBoks member and they had this Challenge called the ABC of ME and we are all supposed to write things with every letter of the alphabet that represents things about us. I thought I play along.

(ZYVWW657YWPR)

A: Art, I love Art, Drawing, Painting, Writing among others.

B: Books, as I love books and I spend a lot of time reading. Also I like Baking more than cooking.

C: Creative, I consider myself to be a creative individual, and I also love Cupcake Wars Show and Camera, as one of my favorite gifts that my husband has given me.

D: Dreams, I have a fascination with the dream world ever since I can remember. 

E: Elsie, my youngest daughter which I love very much!

F: Florida, is where we have thought of moving too many times, yet not decided to do it yet. I tend to be Forgetful too. Florence, I want to visit Florence one day.

G: Gaby is my first born daughter who I also love very much; she is currently 10 but is so smart she can pass by a 13 year old. Also Grace is the name of my grandmother who is currently 89 and I have a portrait of her and my grandfather on my back. Get Tech is the name of my husband’s first computer Store.

H: House, as for the house we want to buy in the next few years.

I: Ice cream Floats, and Island, for the Island of Puerto Rico where I was born and raised.

J: Jesus is the name of my husband and the father of our two daughters. He is wonderful and I wouldn’t change him for the world.

K: Karla Jill is my cousin, she and I got raised together as sisters, she is my best friend and I love her very much. She is a military wife stationed in Germany now, but moving soon to Seattle. Also K is for Kindle, as I won’t leave home without it! It’s perfect for those times when you are bored waiting in line at the bank.

L: Laura, is the name of my mother and it’s also my name. Laracuente is the last name of my grandmother and Liz is the middle name of my daughter Elsie. It also stands for the Law of Attraction which changed my life. Library, for as the one I want to have when we own our own home.

M: Manta Rays are my favorite creatures in the world, I collect things about them and I am fascinated with them. Also Marla is the name of my Aunt. Magazine’s because I love reading magazines, and Maeca, the little girl a sponsor from the Phillipines through Children’s International.

N: Nineteen was how old I was when I started dating my husband.

O: Oreos Double Stuff, as in my favorite cookie! XD

P: Pedro is the name of my adorable 90 year old grandfather. He has a huge space in my heart. Perry was the name of my first dog which I got when I was 11. Pictures as I love to take Pictures. Philippines is from where I sponsor a child

Q: Quest, as in the quest I have been on to find my True Identity since I was 8.

R: Reading, I love reading, and wouldn’t mind doing it all day, every day.

S: Swimming, another thing I love to do yet I don’t get to do it often. I dream of one day having a house with a pool. Spanish is my native language. Sánchez is my grandfather’s Last Name

T: Toro is the last name of my husband and my daughter’s and the name of my husband’s second business, and also it means Bull and the fist tattoo I got was one of a bull in my back. Tattoos, as in me and my husband have lots of tattoos.

U: University, I went to the University of Puerto Rico in Mayagüez

V: Vivoni is the last name of my father.

W: Wonderful as in my life is wonderful and Writer because after so many years being a wannabe, I can finally feel myself truly being a Writer.

X: Xianne, it’s a fake name I created and I have used it in several games.

Y: Yanira, as in the middle name of my oldest daughter. It’s also for my elementary school best friend’s name.   Yellow is my favorite color.

Z: Zealot is my favorite word, not exactly for what it means as much as for the fact it starts with the letter Z, my favorite letter in the alphabet.  I like it because it means basically Fan, and I tend to be obsessively fanatic about some things, so I can relate.

What are the ABC's of You?

Journey to Self Discovery

Not all of you know me well yet, but I want to share that for a lot of my life I have been trying to search for my True Identity. That's why I have started this Blog to begin with. Because I believe that if we help our children be true to themselves right from the beginning, then they will grow to be self confident, happy individuals. And that is my goal, to help parents all over the world to help their kids find their true selves, and at the same time help the parents to find themselves as well, because I know from experience that many times, parents, especially moms, tend to loose part of themselves after they get married, and even more when they have kids. Because women are usually raised to be selfless and nurturing, and they tend to take care of others all the time, and put themselves last. This is not the case with everyone, but I have met many people who have this problem. I am now so much closer to being my true self than I have ever been before, but I still have a bit more to go. I hope that by me telling my story I will be able to help others along the way.

I won't start at the beginning, or say the reasons why things happen the way they do, but I just want to share an experience with all of you.

When I was a little girl I occupied my time doing one of several things, reading, writing my dreams and making stories out of them, drawing, day dreaming, and watching TV and movies and obsessing about famous people. As I grew I came to think that the things I used to do when I was a child were nonsense. So I stopped doing them. I stopped doing every single thing I loved doing as a child and I was left with nothing. After I got married and had children I concentrated on trying to fit this idea of what I thought the perfect wife and mother should be, and idea that I got from somewhere else, not from my heart. I kept trying and trying to be something that I felt I couldn't be. For years I did this, and I lost myself, I lost all interest in things, I became a boring person, just following along, doing what I felt I had to do, not liking anything. I even decided to stop looking at things that I liked, I avoided things that made me happy because I thought that by looking or thinking about things that I liked I would just suffer to know that I couldn't have it. So I tried to avoid pain, by thinking that I did not deserve anything, by not expecting to get anything. Aiming low so that I couldn't get disappointed. But no matter how hard I tried it seemed like everything was bad and nothing could go my way. I went deep into depression for a while but I bounced back after falling in the deepest of wells. And I survived. Then a friend of mine gave me this book about the Law of Attraction and how it is possible to attract good things to you by having happy thoughts and having happy emotions tied to those thoughts. I realized that I had made a big mistake in life by thinking that I should avoid pain by not looking at the things that I loved. I stopped having desires, I never got clarity, focus. I never placed a goal in my life except the one to live a long life. Now I know that I must re-gain clarity, that I must remember the things that made me happy when I was a child and bring back that passion for life once more. Embrace the true gifts that I was born with, and share them with the world.

Have you ever felt like you have lost your way? What have you done to gain it all back?

What you wish you knew at 13?

 I am reviving this post I wrote a while back, because I believe that it has important information that I would like to share especially since now I am getting more views.


The other day as I put my nine year old daughter to sleep and I listened to her talk about tween dilemas I realized as I saw tears trickle down her face that children are just learning about the world. They are at the very beginning of life, when the worst worries are about fitting in, and homework. A time when you cry over a mean comment or get frustrated when homework is too boring. They do not worry about bills to pay or their safety, or about eating healthy or being able to keep a job. They don't have to worry about retirement or elderly parents or any of the worries that we grownups have. And it hit me. What if we could prepare our children to be well adjusted adults by letting them in on well kept secrets only grown-ups know.
That's why I created this website.
Children need to be able to grow with healthy self esteems, know to make decisions that will help them to make better choices.
As I look back upon my life I wonder about the things I wish my mom would have told me about life that I never got to find out until I was all grown. I also see myself constantly searching for my true identity at 35 when I should have found out at least 20 years ago. This constant search for answers, a steady flow of doubt and insecurities that has troubled me for years. What if I had known then what I know now? Would my life be different? What if I had started writing 20 years ago, would my career be better? And although its true that there are many things we will only learn the hard way, there are others that should be learned early on so as to make the most out of your experiences.
Of the things I wish I had known at 13 I have included a few.
* Pay attention to the things you love. There's always a way to make a living doing what you love.
* Date people and learn what qualities you like in a partner and which ones you don't.
* You dont need a college degree to be an artist. Take courses on each technique youd like to learn and practice practice practice.
* It is ok to make mistakes, and to do things you want even though they may not be approved by others.
* If something peaks your interest, research it & explore it.
* Once you have children your life will never be the same.
* Take time to learn about your family history & culture. Know your grandparents.
* Stay true to yourself, & if you dont know what that is. Make it your purpose to find out.
* Give your time to a cause you believe in. Every effort makes a huge difference.
* Find happiness in everyday things.
* Be grateful.
* Dont be afraid to be silly.
* Be a mentor and/or follow one.
* Cultivate your spirit.
* Be kind.
* Be strong.
* Have faith always.
* Don't be afraid to try and change the world.

Dove has been working on helping girls increase their self esteem and they have in their website a part where you can say to others What do you wish you knew when you where 13.

I believe the problem is not finding things to teach our children, but finding a way to teach them so that they will be receptive to the lesson. Because there are things that cannot be told. They have to be experienced in order for them to be learned.

What things you know now that you wish you had learned as a child? And what ideas you have on techniques to teach these ideas? I want to hear from you.

Loving Unconditionally and Not Caring

Today I was reading the July 2011 issue of Oprah Magazine when I came across an article that caught my eye. How to Love More by Caring Less by Martha Beck There was a sentence that shocked me, and it made me feel that the author was being a bit harsh when she said: "Well, Loretta, I just love you. I don't care what happens to you." My first impression was that the part of not caring what happens to her was meant as I-don't-care-if-you-stay-with-your-abusive-husband-and-he-kills-you, kind of thing, but as I read on I was able to understand that what the author means by "not caring" is, "I don't care what you do with your life, I will still love you no matter what." and I got it. Many of us make the mistakes of caring too much, like caring too much about what another person does, or doesn't do. If you find yourself thinking, if so and so could only do this or change in this or that way I would ________________________, then you are not loving unconditionally. I think we all make this mistake in our lives, and I have come to realize that it's better to live and let live, love and let love. AS Martha says "Loving without caring might mean staying calm when your sister gets divorced, or your dad starts smoking again, or your husband gets laid off." To me is not trying to control the outcome of the other person's life, is accepting them with their flaws and all, accepting that they make the choices they make because they can, it's being supportive when your husband wants to buy a motorcycle, even if you are concerned about it. It's knowing that the only person you have control over is yourself. It is accepting the fact that we can all reach a given emotional state even if a loved one does not conform to our wishes. It is thinking that it is possible to stay peaceful and able to embrace joyous occasions even if all our loved ones where to remain toxicaly insane.
We need to shift our focus from controlling our loved one's behavior to creating our own happiness.
I recommend  everyone to read the full article. I believe that for the past few months I have been gradually making this my new reality, I am accepting of my loved ones without caring what they do. Because I accept that they are different than me, that they have their own sets of wishes and desires, and it is not my job to control them or try to make them see life my way. I just have to love them just the way they are.

SELF - What places would you like to visit in the next 5 years? - Social Moms Writing Prompt

Every once in a while I will use a Social Mom's Writing Prompt in my Blog, especially if it has a topic I am interested about or if it's something that I would want to write about to begin with.

I was never one to dream about traveling, except when I was in High School, I was fascinated by Italy and always dreamed I would have my honeymoon there, yet it never happened. After that I discarded the whole idea of traveling up until a few months ago.

As I thought about ways to help out the world and teach my children about philanthropy I realized I wanted to travel the world helping out in different charities all over the world. Take one year to travel the world volunteering with my whole family. We would help the world as we get to experience different cultures, different languages and environments and write about my experiences. I still have a way to go before my dreams become a reality. I have to get a passport for my family, somehow we've managed our whole lives to be without one. We also have to research charities that take volunteers that even children can do. Ideally I would like to be able to stay with a host family in every country so that I could be exposed even more to the culture and the language. So far I have quite a few friends all over the world that hopefully won't mind to let us crash with them for a few weeks.
The places I would like to travel to include International and Local places, and here it is:


Locally:

*California

*Hawaii

Canada

International (Over Seas)

*Italy

*France

*Greece

*China

*Japan

*Australia

*Spain

*Egypt

All the locations with a (*) in them are places where I have a friend living in that country, whether it be a real in-person friend, or an online friend that is close enough that I wouldn't feel awkward asking them if we could stay with them. I just need to find a Canadian friend. Any Volunteers?

Where would you like to travel to?

SELF - Do you ever feel other people's feelings?

I just finished gazing through Kat Von D's book The Tattoo Chronicles. It is a year of her life in journal and pictures of the tattoo's she's made. I must say I read a few pages but I don't think I can read the whole thing. Mainly because it is too intense. It may seem odd, but I have the ability to absorb emotions from people and things, a trait that has me walking away from things sometimes when the emotions become too intense for me to handle. On this trip I realized that I can also absorb the emotions of my friends as I would start feeling nervous at the same time my friend would without me having any reason to feel nervous otherwise.
So as I went through the pages, I read a few words and as I did it was as if I was feeling what Kat was feeling at the moment she was writing the book and I had to stop myself from reading. Even some of the pictures carried so much emotion that I was afraid to look at them too close. I wonder if there are more people that have this ability that renders us sensitive to the energies of others through different mediums. Do you feel that way sometimes?

SELF - How do you get Motivated?

The other day I was chatting with a friend when they pointed out that the new generations lack the curiosity and motivation that was prominent many years ago that allowed Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell, and so many others to come up with the amazing inventions they did. Back then there was a lack of commodities, so there was a need for so many things and I think that's what motivated these people. Now, on the other hand, people have almost everything, and even though not all people have everything, the majority of things that are actually needed for us to have a comfortable existence have already been invented, so this leaves all these new generations feeling all comfortable and great, so they don't feel the need to create. Now it's all about making improvements to what already exists and even all the old movies are being re-made. It seems that now there's no new things happening anymore, not in books, not in movies, not in music, not in technology. Everything is re-made, improved, but rarely new.
These new generations seem to be looking now for better rights, save the planet, helping out, and all this is really great, it seems to be an attempt to fix things from the past. But it is still a movement that was started many years ago, it is still a variation from the past. Nothing new is happening. Are we stuck this way? Is there no room for new things? How about something that will guarantee world peace? Or something that will end world hunger? Is that even possible? But then when people try to create hybrid foods in the efforts to diminish world hunger, people are criticized for going against nature. Now many want to go back to the basics, everything must be organic, eat only raw foods, etc. Maybe this is a way for the world to have a new beginning when everything has already been invented. Start from scratch. But we can't forget that light bulbs exist or telephones or computers...or money. If we could only find a way to bring resources to the underdeveloped countries, bring the technology to allow everyone to stay healthy without having people come and criticize the efforts as unnatural.
How can we stay motivated? How can we create again, without having the fear of being turned down by society, how can we innovate? How do we teach our children to be creative when we don't even know how?

The Thing about Resentment

Resentment is a very dangerous thing, it's like a poison that invades your blood and it spreads throughout your body. It can't be ignored, as it stays dormant in your body waiting for the right moment to come back and make you sick.
So what causes resentment? To me, resentment is caused by allowing someone to do something bad to you and not saying anything about it. It's created by swallowing anger, and accepting mistreatment. Sometimes the person that has harmed you did not know or realize that they had harmed you, they may have really never meant to do you harm. Maybe they did. But if you don't say anything, if you don't tell them how you feel, your resentment will continue to grow.
This applies to most people, yet the way to get rid of resentment with your spouse is completely different and that's a whole 'nother story. But if the person you are carrying resentment towards is a friend or co-worker or boss, then I suggest you make your case be heard if you would like to be able to get rid of the churning in your stomach and the negative thoughts that come with it.

At this moment in time I am carrying resentment with my boss. I am hesitant to tell the whole story as you know how Heather Armstrong got fired  for saying bad things about her job.
But the thing that bothers me the most is that my boss complains to my husband behind my back that he doesn't like the fact that I am working only part time now and he doesn't like the girl I got to help me. Well he fails to see that he was the one who made the choice or allowed his father to make the choice of hiring an incompetent to be in the office that is right next to my house and behind my daughter's school even though I specifically asked him to let me work in that office since it would allow me to work full time and still be able to pick up my daughters from school. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I have to work in the office that's an hour away simply because it's close to my boss' house and it's more convenient for him. And he's rarely there anyway. He moves around 3 general areas, there is no reason for him to keep me in the other office. Some days I just feel like telling him to F' off and quit. But I want to go about this in a different way. I want to take a course in marketing that's $5000 and after I pay it off then I can move on.

Resentment is not only created by what other people do to you. It is created by our own actions, by allowing ourselves to be treated in a way that is not acceptable to us. It is something of an alarm that tells us that we need to take action and look at our situation and make a change.
Do you ever feel resentful towards someone? What do you do about it?

How much do you sleep?

How do you find time to sleep? I tend to have a tendency to fall asleep at random situations and I wonder if there's something I can do to prevent this. I know I go to bed way too late, but I find that there's somethings you just have to do. If my husband come home late from work most days then I must work around that so that I have some time with him at the end of the day as I find that to be important. But it is detrimental when I end up falling asleep when I'm trying to spend some time with the hubby. Sometimes I find that it is helpful to take a nap before he comes over so that I am a little bit rested and more energetic, but I have been told that there are foods that can give me more energy. What are those? Are you familiar with that?
I am going to Google it sometime this week and let you guys know what I find.
Are there any tips or tricks that you have to make the best of your time awake, and your sleep time?
What do you find that works best with you? How many hours do you sleep at night? I tend to sleep between 4 to 6 hrs. Well, I'm so sleepy I can't stay awake any longer. Talk to you tomorrow!

How do you act when you don't think anyone is watching?

If there were no consequences, would you act the same way you normally do?
I think there's a lot to say about a person who chooses to do the right thing even when no one is looking. It is then that we express our true selves without worry to do as society dictates. Yet there are things that most people won't do even if we knew there would be no consequences, for example, I would never kill a person, or an animal for that matter. It is not in my nature to take life away from a living being. Maybe you wouldn't either.
But would you steal, or lie or cheat? Somehow these other sins seem to be less difficult to commit especially since the thing here is would we do them if there were no consequences to our actions.
What things would you do if you knew you couldn't get caught and would suffer no consequences?

What inspires you?

Last night I took my friend to Times Square. As I got off the subway at Bryant Park I was amazed of all the cool things that I saw. I had not been here in about 3 years and I had forgotten the exhilarating feeling of seeing the lights and the tall buildings and the larger than life ads, and stores from almost all the major brands available to us, plus quite a few not-as-known.
I realized how I have been living in a cocoon for quite a while not exposing me to things that inspire me. I would always find excuses for not going out. But I have decided to expose myself to things that inspire me, because by being inspired I will be encouraged to do better things.
Find out what inspires you, and do it more often.

Friends Forever

Today I was reading The Rules of Life by Richard Templar and it read, "Someone once said that a real friend is someone you can  be having a conversation with as she gets on a plane, you don't see her for ten years, and when she arrives back you carry on the conversation as she gets off the plane like a moment hasn't passed." That premise made me think of my friends and how our friendship is exactly that.
For years I complained how I didn't have any friends and how all my friend's had abandoned me in one way or another, until two years ago that I finally was able to reconnect with a few old friends that I had not seen in more than ten years, and our friendship continued just like the statement suggested, as if not a moment had passed.
I have also made a few new friends since I've moved to NYC and I must say that we do not need to see each other every day to care and know that we are cherished and valued as friends. I am proud to call them my friends.
Today I am doubly blessed because not only do I get the chance to hang out with one of my new BFF's at my Wednesday Writing Group, but I get to go and pick up at the airport one of my BFF's since I was 12 y/o and get to have her a whole week to myself.
I am thankful for having my childhood best friends still be part of my life, for having some wonderful new friendships that I have made here in NYC and for all the loved ones that I only know through the internet, but that they are equally loved and cherished. To all of you I send a big hug and know that I'm blessed to have you be part of my life. I LOVE YOU!

Take the time to think about the people that you are grateful to call your friends. Do something nice for them today!

The Significance of Anger

I usually try to avoid anger, yet anger is a natural response. It is healthy to admit that we are angry, because it usually means that there is a conflict between our beliefs or boundaries and what is going on at the moment. It is healthy to own anger, yet I have a hard time doing so. I fear loosing control or creating an argument when all I want is to be left alone.

At this moment I must confess I feel angry, I feel disrespected, and I am trying to dismiss this anger because I believe that if I try to talk it out it will be pointless. My point of view will not be acknowledged but it will be dismissed as neurotic and this will cause me even more anger. So what are we supposed to do, when the person you are upset with will not hear you out and there's no way to escape? I don't know. Maybe I should try. Because the truth is that we are the ones who make ourselves angry, no one can make us angry unless we allow them to. It is all in the way we choose to react to things.

So we do have a choice to be or not to be angry, but we do have to learn to own anger and not let it become powerful over us. We also need to stand up for ourselves and not let others put us down.

How do you deal with anger?